Roy and Amy | Clark Coaching and Counseling

3 Ways Imperfection Adds Beauty To Your Relationships

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What is the perfect relationship? Movies and books would have you think you have to attain perfection to be happy as a couple. Nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, there are several ways in which imperfection adds beauty to your relationship.

Consider these things:

Imperfection is What Draws You Closer

When we first meet someone new, we tend to wear a mask. We want people to see us as something bigger and better than we are. This showboating is normal. Everyone likes to be liked. But when you’re in a relationship, there comes a time when you need to take the masks off. Here’s where you share your imperfections and vulnerabilities with the other person. In these moments, you allow someone to see your truest self, where you build the closest relationship. This is an amazingly intimate process. When the other person likewise feels safe enough to reveal their innermost self to you, these vulnerabilities come together to form the closest relationship you will ever experience in your lifetime. All of this stems from your imperfections. You couldn’t reach this point without them.

Imperfection Teaches us Compassion

When you’re in a relationship, it’s not uncommon to start noticing the other person’s flaws. If you are caught up in perfectionism, these flaws will irritate and annoy you. Why are they not more perfect? Why are they not trying the way you are? On the other hand, if you are willing to admit to your flaws and imperfections, these mistakes will make you feel compassion and tolerance when the other person messes up. After all, would we want them to give the same to us?

Imperfection Builds Better Habits

Isn’t it funny how we come to be like our significant other? When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, the other person’s decisions start to become our decisions as well. For example: if the other person makes poor choices regarding health or fitness, it’s quite likely you will as well. The nice thing about admitting to imperfections is we’re able to see where we’re messing up and correct our behavior. Our significant other see us making this effort and will follow our lead more often than not. Thankfully, these joint mistakes become something you can later laugh about. Even if it’s painful, our imperfections can unite us as we learn new lessons, to create a better and healthier “us.”

These three items might not seem very important at first glance, but give them a chance. If you’re willing to be imperfect with the other person, you will find they are more willing to be imperfect with you. This is a beautiful thing and helps build a stronger and more long-lasting relationship.